Shift your Mindset and Hit a Homerun
Every day we wake up and expect that our life will have a certain path. When I awake in the morning, I have an idea of my day ahead. My best intentions set the night before can consist of getting my coffee, reading email, meditating, taking my dogs for a walk, a little more self-care, taking a shower, and leaving for work. What really happens is that I get out of bed only after contemplating the ins-outs upon awakening and get overwhelmed by the possibilities of what might happen. I either shout at myself to move and do what I planned or say to myself, “What’s the use? I need to cut out one of my tasks. Ugh!”
Strike One!
Why?! How did this happen? Why did I not hit the ball? Why did I miss it? First thing, stop the negative thought right now! You will just stay in a loop of woe is me! Thinking about what did happen is not going to move you forward with your day. What we have to think about is our mindset. Changing it is the first step. Make a different statement such as I will have a great day.
Strike Two!
I failed, again! If you are telling yourself this, then you probably did something similar that made you strike out the first time. And now, you have done it again! Move away from the self-blame. Take a step back and shift away from that inner child telling you that you are not good enough. One start is to find a task to complete. The task could be analyzing the steps that made you fail and learning to correct them. Say to yourself that failing is only a lesson on how to correct and shift your progress on a different path.
Strike Three?
Why am I afraid? If I fail again, I will be OUT! Fear can be irrational. We think that our memories of failure in the past will dictate our future. This memory is just that – a MEMORY. It has nothing to do with you NOW. This morning when you woke up, you became a different person than you were the day before and the day before that.
Batting Practice!
Like swinging a bat, it takes practice. You have to know where to place your feet, how to hold the bat, when to hit and how to follow through. Creating habits and overcoming your procrastination are similar. Changing how you think, or your “mindset” is a learned skill as well.
How do we change this outcome? In learning how to hit a ball with a bat properly coaches teach to start with where to place your feet or how to “connect to the ground”. When learning how to not procrastinate you need to figure out why. Neil Fiore redefined procrastination in The Now Habit. His definition is –
Procrastination is a mechanism for coping with the anxiety
associated with starting or completing any task or decision
you define as a threat to your self-worth.
What is associated with your procrastination? Is it just anxiety or a definition you have about yourself? I have said several times (and still tell myself) that I could not possibly write and put my words out into the universe. Nobody wants to hear what I have to say. The definition I had of myself was that I was unworthy.
When I was younger and going to therapy, he diagnosed me with “perfectionism”. My first thought was Wow that means I am great at the tasks I complete. He explained that perfectionism is someone who has a great idea in their head but fears the criticism and possible rejection that will occur. The reality of an idea is hardly ever the dream of it. So, we stop and procrastinate on taking steps to make it a reality. It is difficult to accept yourself just as you are – human. My heart sank!
There are a variety of ways to reach the finish line or learn “how to bat like a pro”. If you like the ongoing sports analogy, athletes have been known to visualize a perfect performance. Bob Bowman, coach to Olympic gold medal swimmer, Michael Phelps, says his performance was due to three daily habits –
- Vision – Bowman had his swimmers visualize the process, not the outcome. The visualization had to include seeing this is key. However, you can think about the worse possible outcome. Samurai meditated on being killed in the worst possible way, but that was so they had no fear.
- Mental Rehearsal – He stated, “If you can form a strong mental picture and visualize yourself doing it, your brain will immediately find ways to get you there” and “ The brain cannot distinguish between something that’s vividly imagined and something that’s real.
- Practice – The wonderful result of practice is that you have literally programmed your brain for peak performance. Bowman stated that Phelps trained 365 days a year.
There are several theories about getting your momentum started. First, stop thinking about what is wrong with you and focus on what you can begin.
1. James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits, invokes the “2-Minute Rule”. It states that if you are starting a new habit that it should take less than two minutes. This takes a larger goal and breaks it down to very small tasks. In other words, it should take under two minutes to complete.
2. Get a good night’s sleep. Sleep is important to have a strong brain function. Sleep deprivation can mess with your daily focus. It also is bad for regular cognitive functions like attention and working memory. So, turn off the cell phone and television because feeling fresh in the morning makes you want to get out of bed and start your day.
3. When you think about your day ahead, think about the good parts of the day or the ending of the day. How will you feel at the end of the day when what you had set for the beginning of the day was not accomplished? Begin it by telling yourself Today will be a great day!
4. Set yourself up for success the day before. Make your coffee in the evening (if you drink it) so it is ready and smells wonderful in the morning. Write down or review what tomorrow will look like for your schedule and be sure to make some fun time for yourself.
Swing Away
Whatever choice you make to begin your day and change how you see yourself and the world around you is important. But, the most important thing you do is to make a choice. Too many times have I laid in bed and thrown the covers over my head had said forget it. I don’t want to do that anymore. Tomorrow, I’m going to wake up and tell myself that today will be great. I will plant my feet firmly on the ground, look the pitcher in the eye, and when that ball comes near me, I will swing that bat with all my might. If I fail, it doesn’t matter, because I tried without thinking twice about it.